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God, Help My Marriage Part 3

Building A Dream Marriage

Jonathan Stockstill

January 21, 2018

Three Essentials to a Dream Marriage

1. I am committed to CHANGE.

  • Change to a biblical view of marriage.
  • Ephesians 5:22-25 (NLT)

Reasons people resist change towards biblical roles in marriage

  • Fear of going first
  • Society’s influence
  • Lack of belief

Commit to changing the selfish things that cause the marriage to feel strained.

2. I am committed to meeting my spouse’s NEEDS.

Four needs of a woman

  • Security (sacrifice, admiration, faithfulness, and provision make a woman feel secure)
  • Nonsexual affection
  • Open communication
  • Leadership

Four needs of a man

  • Honor
  • Sex
  • Fellowship
  • Domestic support

3. I am committed to ROMANCE.

Song of Solomon 5:1-2 (NLT) — 1 I have entered my garden, my treasure, my bride! I gather myrrh with my spices and eat honeycomb with my honey. I drink wine with my milk. Oh, lover and beloved, eat and drink! Yes, drink deeply of your love! 2 I slept, but my heart was awake, when I heard my lover knocking and calling: “Open to me, my treasure, my darling, my dove, my perfect one.”

Four things that define romance

  • Romance is private time with focused attention: “I have entered my garden.”
  • Romance is passionate embrace: “Yes, drink deeply of your love.”
  • Romance is mindfulness: “I slept, but my heart was awake.”
  • Romance is pursuit: “Open to me.”

Remember: Romance is the language of desire. Lack of romance is the language of rejection.

XO Marriage Conference

February 9 & 10

Gateway’s XO Marriage Conference is coming to Bethany. This is the largest marriage conference of its kind, designed to enhance intimacy, renew passion, and refresh your relationship. No matter where you are in the journey of marriage, come and encounter God’s dream for your future.

Register online at

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